Kim Saeed writes that within each cycle of abuse there is a moment where a change can be made, an opportunity, if you will to change the negative script that keeps repeating. Perhaps every time an abusive incident happens we think (or hope) it will be the last and we will be saved from having to make a “hard decision”. But according to this article, this is actually a chance, an opportunity to start a new pattern in life for our future. What do you think? .
“Your abuser will find another person who shines brightly. Your abuser will wow his New Light with loving actions, sweet words; your abuser will seem to the New Light like a gift from heaven. The New Light will probably be a lot like you…..The New Light is no better than you. Sure, you may feel defeated right now, but your light is on the mend. You are coming back into who you are and always were. But your abuser’s New Light is on the way to darkness.”
“The narcissist’s enablers, are masters at overlooking red flags, blatant abuse, and the fact that the narcissist is causing and not resolving any of the problems, stating, “There are two sides to every story.”
It truly is amazing. And a victim needs to be stand even stronger still, as she takes on more nightmares in this narcissist’s drama. The target needs to be armed with defenses because she not only has to fight the narcissist and her own inner codependency issues; she also has to fight a myriad of other people whom she may have originally thought would be her allies or support system. The target ends up feeling like she has to climb a mountain with no tools, while those around her are gossiping about her and throwing rocks her way!
“But it’s hard to feel happy about being abused — and it’s even harder to feel good about watching people you’ve known forever literally turn their backs on you when and if you out an Abuser.
Suggest something as outlandish as having all the family members come together to stop enabling a Cluster B family member, or to watch while you sit back feeling powerless to defend yourself from smear campaigns started by an angry, socially toxic con artist who is actively preying on you or your family member(s) and LOOK OUT.”