“As if the abusive marriage, relationship or business partnership wasn’t bad enough, the narcissist has to escalate the matter by threatening legal action. The legal system becomes an unknowing and unwilling extension of the narcissistic arm reaching out to cause as much damage as possible. Their take no prisoners’ attitude stops at nothing to seek revenge for causing pain over some perceived embarrassment.”
If you’re in a controlling and abusive relationship, you may recognize several of the characteristics described in this article by Consulting Clinical Psychologist Dr Joseph M. Carver, PhD. Beginning with a description of how bonds form between victim and abuser, the article continues with observations about cognitive dissonance and offers suggestions for friends and family of victims. Love And Stockholm Syndrome: The Mystery of Loving An Abuser, Page 1
As a society, we place a high value on charm; when we meet new people, we love it if they are very quickly smooth, funny, entertaining, and flattering. We are charmed when they seem immediately ready to jump into doing favors for us. We love confidence, lively story-telling, and a sharp personal appearance.
And it all can be bad news.