Targeted Parents & Social Media, PAAO, USA Inc

PARENTAL ALIENATION TIP OF THE DAY – SHOULD TARGET PARENTS USE SOCIAL MEDIA?

Wendy Archer, November 9, 2013 at 9:19am

Do you know a child or young adult who is alienated from one of their parents?  If so, are you “friends” with the parent who has a relationship with the alienated child or young adult also known as the favored parent?  Does this favored parent say to you “The reason *child’s name* doesn’t talk to *other parent* is because *other parent* posts about them and posts about parental alienation on social media.  If the other parent didn’t post anything about them or about parental alienation on social media, then they would talk to the other parent.”

If you know an alienated child and are friends with the favored (alienating) parent, you’ve probably heard this and it might have even sounded reasonable to you. You might have thought “Gee, that sounds easy.  Why doesn’t ‘target parent’ just stop posting about the alienated child and parental alienation on social media and then the child will talk to them again?”

If you have listened to and bought into this reasoning, the least you can do for the sake of the heartbroken alienated child you know is read this article.

Here are a few things you need to know….

1.  No child has ever started communicating with a target parent again simply because the target parent stopped posting about them or parental alienation on social media.  If it was that simple, we all would have done that and been reunified with our children by now.

2  When a target parent stops posting about how much they love and miss their child on social media, the alienating parent actually uses that to strengthen the alienation by saying things like “Your *other parent* has stopped mentioning you completely on social media.  See, they don’t really care about you or love you or want a relationship with you.  Looks like they’ve given up on you and forgotten all about you.”

One example of this was when a target parent who hadn’t seen 1 of their 3 children for four years posted a photo of the 2 children that they do have a relationship with on facebook.  The alienator, who relentlessly stalks the target parent, copied and pasted the post and photo with the two children and sent it to the alienated young adult telling the alienated young adult “Target Parent is posting as if they only have two children.  They aren’t mentioning you at all.  That is such a mean thing to do to you.”  This alienator is constantly pressuring and harassing the target parent to stop posting about the alienated child online yet when the target parent did make a post without referring to the alienated child, the alienator used it for more alienation.  This is a perfect (AND REAL) example of how alienators will use EVERY opportunity to alienate.  If a target parent posts about an alienated child, an alienator will use that to further alienate.  If a target parent doen’t post about an alienated child, the alienator will use that to further alienate.  (Obviously, the only reason the target parent didn’t post a photo with the alienated child is that the target parent hasn’t seen the alienated child for four years and therefore doesn’t have any recent photos.)

3.  Alienators will often claim that the alienated child has told the target parent to stop posting about them and about parental alienation on social media and that the alienated child has told the target parent “If you stop posting about me and about parental alienation on social media, I’ll talk to you again.”  The truth is alienated children very rarely say this to target parents, ALL alienated children have confirmed that they were forced to say it by the alienating parent.  In fact, the truth is quite the opposite and many alienated children have secretly contacted the target parents saying things like “I read your posts about how much you love me and miss me.  I love you and miss you too. ‘Alienating parent’ is watching to make sure I don’t talk to you.  They monitor all of my emails, text messages and phone calls.  It’s not safe for me to talk to you yet but I’m trying to break free and find a safe way  to talk to you.  Please keep posting and know that I love you, miss you and want to talk to you even though I can’t yet.”

4.  The REAL reason alienators want target parents to stop posting about parental alienation on social media is because they don’t want to be exposed.  Keeping the truth about parental alienation a secret protects the alienator and allows them to easily continue alienating the children. Nothing is worse to an alienator than the truth being exposed. 

5.  Remember, the most obvious sign of parental alienation is that a child doesn’t have a relationship with one parent WHILE they have a very ENMESHED relationship with the other parent.  (This is NOT normal and no child “chooses” this regardless of what a parent might say.  Alienating parents and alienating stepparents can be very charming and very convincing.  Refer to the article  “PARENTAL ALIENATION TIP OF THE DAY”

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5 thoughts on “Targeted Parents & Social Media, PAAO, USA Inc

  1. AMother'sHeartSongsUnsilenced Post author

    Reblogged this on AMother'sHeartSongsUnsilenced and commented:

    How many of you have been backed into a corner, while bullies and mercenaries in family court assist your abusive spouse in taking away your own Heartsong? Your precious child? And you feel like you must continually keep the “high ground”. Don’t stoop to that level. Don’t be, God forbid, an alienating parent. Well, what do we tell our kids down the road later, when they (maybe) learn the truth about the lies and maneuvers? Many of these kids say “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME THE TRUTH!” Yes, our kids deserve to hear OUR truth. The truth about ourselves, and our devoted love to them. They deserve to have the record set straight about us. Being a Targeted parent makes us walk on eggshells all the time, in order to try harder, be better, try to measure up, to miss a never ending barrage of loaded, toxic missiles. But we are not perfect, nor should we ever expect ourselves to be!!! And we must not be silent!!!!!

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  2. prh

    Dear Mom….Reading all of this certainly makes our heart ache for you . Hoping it is helpful to know that we are praying and believe that God will set this crooked path straight. I wonder if we could get all the people that know the Lord to pray every day at the same time, sort of a concert of prayer going. No idea how to do that, but am hopeful, because you are also resourceful. Will continue to pray for you as many times as the Lord brings you and your child to my mind. You are an inspiration to all of us. May God bless you and hold your heart in his own hands. Praying for you to have a peace which the world cannot give, the peace that passes all understanding, which can only be given by God. This is really good and will educate a lot of people. Hope that judges, lawyers, and psychiatrists will read this and that God will open their eyes as they read it, it is my hope that they will get a new perspective that will help them do their job better too. Just remember that God will walk with you through it and bring you out on the other side…
    In Service of the Master….prh

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    1. Sharing your pain

      I agree, prh. I like your idea of a concert of prayer for this Mom. We need to show our support for this Mom who is under under attack. There is a great advantage when we stand together. If you have ideas, please put them out there. When there is a hurricane or tornado, people band together. When a child is stolen there is an Amber Alert.

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      1. lgw31773

        Exactly! I got so mad one day because a friend was up in arms on fb over a local woman being ordered by a family court judge to stop breastfeeding so she could share custody w.her ex. I asked where her outrage was when my daughter was taken from me because I missed a court date, not because I was unfit or anything else, but because I forgot about and missed ONE court date! And she said it was because of the mom I was that I lost my child to my alternator. Even though she had watched the alienation occurring since kindergarten!

        People just don’t care about us and our children and what they’re going through! Their attitude is that it’s our fault so there’s nothing they can do or we don’t deserve the help. But God forbid it happens to them . . .

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      2. AMother'sHeartSongsUnsilenced Post author

        Thank you for writing. It is extremely disappointing, the level of apathy and lack of compassion. We must continue to speak out, educate and demand change. Our children are counting on us. Sending prayers for peace and justice in the coming year.

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